A man wakes up in hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says 'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now you probably won't remember, but I'm afraid you were in a pile-up on the motorway.'
'You're going to be OK, you'll walk again, everything seems to be OK, but there is a bit of bad news and I'm going to break it to you as gently as I can: your Willy was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it.'
The bloke groans a bit (as you do) but the doctor goes on, 'We've checked your insurance and you've actually got £9,000 compensation coming to you and the good news is that we have the technology now to build you a new Willy that will work just as well as your old one, better in fact.
But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It is one thousand pounds an inch.'
The bloke perks up a bit at this (as you would.)
'So it's a simple decision,' the doctor says, "you need to decide how many inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife.
I mean, if you had a five inch Willy before and you decide to go for a nine Willy now, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine incher before and you decide only to invest in a five incher now, she might be a bit disappointed.
So it's important that you consult with her to help you make the decision.'
The bloke agrees to talk with his wife and comes back the next day.
'So' the doctor says, 'have you spoken with your wife?'
'I have.' says the chap.
'And has she helped you to make the decision?'
'Yes, she has' he says.
'And what is the decision?' asks the doctor.
'We're having a new kitchen.'
Priorities
Saturday, 22 September 2007
Get your Free Iphone
Saturday, 8 September 2007
Get your FREE IPOD
Other links as well: http://www.freebies4eveyone.co.uk
New Apple Item: Ipod Touch
Ipod Touch:
Price 8Gb £199.00 and 16GB £269.00
Music downloads straight from iTunes:
Shop the iTunes Wi-Fi Music Store from anywhere with Wi-Fi.1 Browse or search to find the music you’re looking for, preview it, and buy it with just a tap.
Brilliant 3.5-inch widescreen display:
Watch your movies, TV shows, and slideshows come alive with bright, vivid color on the 320-by-480-pixel display
Revolutionary multi-touch interface:
iPod touch features the same multi-touch screen technology as iPhone. Pinch to zoom in on a photo. Scroll through your songs and videos with a flick. Flip through your library by album artwork with Cover Flow.
Surf the web with Wi-Fi:
Browse the web using Safari and watch YouTube videos on the first iPod with Wi-Fi built in.
What’s in the box:
• iPod touch
• Earphones
• USB 2.0 cable
• Dock adapter
• Polishing cloth
• Stand
• Quick Start guide
If you want to BUY ONE go HERE
New Apple Item: Ipod Nano Video
Ipod Nano Video:
The 4GB is £99.00 and 8GB is £129.00
Video in your pocket:
It’s the small iPod with one very big idea: video. The world’s most popular digital music player now lets you enjoy movies, TV shows, and more on a two-inch display that’s 65% brighter than before.
Cover Flow:
Browse through your music and video collection by flipping through album art. Select an album to turn it over and see the track list.
Enhanced interface:
Experience a whole new way to browse and view your music and video.
Sleek and colorful:
With an anodized aluminum and polished stainless steel enclosure and a choice of five colors, iPod nano is dressed to impress.
Whats in the box:
• iPod nano
• Earphones
• USB 2.0 cable
• Dock adapter
• Quick Start guide
Visit HERE to BUY ONE
Fergie's Hummer
Thursday, 6 September 2007
Fergie is selling her Hummer on ebay and all money is going to charity
After performing at Live Earth and realizing everyone has a role to play in protecting the environment, Fergie decided to sell her HUMMER and donate all the proceeds to Global Green USA. The cynic may say that this is just transferring the negative effects of the vehicle to someone else, but in supporting Global Green USA, the charity is donating carbon emission credits for 10 years to offset the impact and in addition it is using the money to work on the important issue of climate change.
This auction is being listed on eBay Giving Works, which is the dedicated program for charity listings on eBay. This is your chance to also play a role in helping to improve our global climate, not only by bidding, but by selling your own items on eBay Giving Works and donating 10-100% of the proceeds to benefit Global Green or one of many other environmental charities which are part of the eBay Giving Works program. Click on the Giving Works logo below to learn more or email us if you need some tips on selling on eBay for a cause.
Fergie's DUB Edition Hummer H2: As seen in DUB Magazine (Oct 2005)!
Suspension:
McGaughys suspension with coil spring rear 03-04 2/3 deluxe drop kit with spindles and shock extenders. Installation by HW Motorsports.
Body:
Front grille by Grillcraft Sport GrillesChrome accessories-handles, gas, cover, etc-by Real WheelsCustom drop-down side steps by FST Motorsports with "Fergie" in Old English cut into them
Wheels and Tires:
24-inch Asanti V.P. wheelsPirelli Scorpion Zero 305/35R24 tires
Audio/Video/Navi:
w3v2's woofersTwo Xtant X001 amplifiersOne Xtant X604 4-channel amplifierTwo MTX T8.6 componentsTwo 7-inch Vizualogic headrest monitorsOne 15-inch Vizualogic flip-down monitorOne Vizualogic DVD playerStreetWires RCA cables, power wire caps and distribution blocks
Interior Additions:
Custom, molded fiberglass subwoofer enclosure wrapped in green suedeCustom fiberglass amp racks built and wrapped in green suedeCustom, hand-built fiberglass door pods, wrapped in suede
Go HERE to visit Ebay Auction
Falling into that beautiful thing called LOVE...
Wednesday, 5 September 2007
Britney’s comeback single- Gimme More
Saturday, 1 September 2007
Described as "an uptempo club cut" and "funky", the song has been produced by Timbaland protege Nate "Danjahandz" Hills, who has scored hits for the likes of Justin Timberlake and T.I.
Troubled pop diva Britney Spears’ long-awaited comeback single, Gimme More, will be released in November this year.
The song was officially premiered on New York radio station Z-110’s website on Thursday night. A spokesperson for Jive records has confirmed that the dance track will be available in music stores on 13 November, according to People magazine.
"It's Britney, bitch," Contactmusic quoted the diva as announcing the start of her catchy song. The song is from the singer’s long-gestating fifth studio album.
Described as "an uptempo club cut" and "funky", the song has been produced by Timbaland protege Nate "Danjahandz" Hills, who has scored hits for the likes of Justin Timberlake and T.I. The single made its debut just moments after versions of it were leaked to at least two other Web sites, Perezhilton and TMZ.
Britney has not released an album since B In The Mix: The Remixes in 2005. Her last LP containing new material was Into The Zone in 2003.
Britney Spears New Perfume
"She looked amazing, but she left the shoot three times in a state of distress before driving away for good," a source said.
"They had decent shots of her face, but not her body, so the art director made the stylist - a cute girl name Kylie Cavaco - get in Britney's clothes and pose.
"They are superimposing Britney's head on Kylie's body. Kylie has the body Brit used to have, not the one she has now."
